Fighting with Wolves
The eighth episode of the series. Enjoy! Script Normal text = The character is speaking normally. Italic text = The character is singing. *(Rack is watching the news.) *'Reporter': ....And that's how the little mutant pig boy got out of the well. In other news, Mayor US read to kids at a local school. *(Cuts to US reading a children's book in a classroom.) *'US': (reading):.....And........... and then............ little............ Jimmy........ went to............. the........... li-........... librar-........ librarie. (not reading): Whoa, this library thing got popular fast! *'Dep Mayor': Are you having trouble, Miss US? *'US': Shhhhhh! I'm reading! *'Rack': US is a great reader. *'NH': Ha, you must be kidding. Rig is a better reader than that imbecile. Rig, read. *'Rig': Math gives me gas. *'Rack': Huh? Oh, yeah, nice. *'NH': Are you ignoring me?! *'Rack': Okay. *'NH': I will not be ignored! *'Rack': Okay, have fun at the dance. *'NH': Let's go, Rig. We must rule the town. *'Rig': Math gives me the pooties, pooties, pooties, pooties pooties, pooties, pootie-'' *'NH': Stop. Singing. *'Rig': Aw, okay. I'LL JUST YELL THEN! *'NH': Rig, stop wasting time! *'Rig': YELLING, YELLING, YELL-Okay. *('Later......) *'''NH: Hm, we need to figure out a way to rule the town. *(Rig is chewing the foam of a coach.) *'Rig': I got rabies! *'NH': ............Perhaps I need more help. *(NH and Rig are walking in the streets.) *'Rig': Are we gettin' fast food? Are we gettin' fast food? Are we gettin' fast food? Are we-. *'NH': No Rig. We're getting help to rule the town. *'Rig': Aw, but I want some food. *'NH': Look in the garbage then. *'Rig': Okay! *(Rig eats food in the garbage.) *'NH': That'll keep her busy for 5...... *(Rig shows up.) *'NH': .......Seconds. Oh well. Do you have any ideas how to lure our help? *'Rig': Steak! It has chicken and chocolate in it! *'NH': Rig.......... we're not doing that. *'Rig': I'm telling ya........ it'll work! *'NH': I'd rather civilly ask them to. *'Rig': I dunno what that means. *'NH': Okay, you stay here, and I'll convince them and come back. *'Rig': Okie dokie. *(NH leaves.) *'Rig': (Notices candy wrapper; the candy wrapper goes away with the wind): No, comes back! I need to know more about you! *(Rig runs away, following the wrapper.) *(Cut to NH.) *'NH': (notices building): Hm, what's this? (looks at the window; notices wolves from inside the building): Yes, my own kind! Finally someone I can relate to! *(Cut to the wolves inside the building.) *'Wolf': Oh my, why is that wolf outside talking to himself? *'Wolf #2': I have no idea. Perhaps we should let him inside? *'Wolf': Why not? Perhaps he could be just like us. *(One of the wolves opens the door.) *'NH': And then I'll finally-. Oh hello. *'Wolf': Would you like to come in? *'NH': Why of course. *(NH goes inside.) *'Wolf': Now, may I ask, why were you outside all alone talking to yourself? *'NH': Oh, I do that a lot. That's just who I am. *'Wolf': I see. *'NH': But I did however come by to ask you all something. *'Wolf': Go ahead, and, as they say, "shoot". *'NH': I wanted to civilly ask you all to be in my army and rule the town. What do you say? *'Wolf': I must apologize but we do not want to be in any army. Thank you for the offer though. *'NH': You will join my army if it is the last thing I do! (Slams door hard) *'Wolf': I must say he seems dedicated to join his army. *(NH is walking back to where Rig was.) *'NH': Rig? Rig? Where are you? *(Notices a note on the ground.) *(The note says in horrible spelling and NH reads: "II haad tooo findd aa kandy rapper. C yaa l8ter.") ' *'NH: Idiot. (sniffs) Ew, what's that smell? Oh, it's Rig's "steak". Hm...... *(NH goes back to the place with the wolves.) *(NH knocks at the door.) *'Wolf': Oh my, it is that wolf fellow again. Perhaps he is here for the same reason as before. I will open it anyway. *(Opens door.) *'NH': Look what I have brought: steak! *'Wolf': Steak? DID HE JUST SAY STEAK?! *(All of the wolves quickly jump on NH and attempt to eat the steak.) *'NH': Now will you be in my army? *'Wolves': Indubitably. *'NH': Excellent. *(Later. The wolves are discussing what their name should be.) *'NH': Brethren, welcome to The Army of New Heathera. *'Wolf': Why not Army of the Wolves? *'NH': New Heathera sounds better. *'Wolf #2': I don't know, maybe The Army of William Chester III? *(A cricket is heard chirping.) *'Wolf #2': Hmph. *'NH': So it's settled. *'Wolf': Hahahahahhahahah! *'NH': What's so funny? *'Wolf':You did it again! Oh, how you amuse me so. *'NH': Did what? *'Wolf': You spoke in contractions. How informal. Hahahahahha! *'NH': Anyway...... let's go to town hall! *(Cut to Rack in his house.) *'Rack': Huh, NH has been gone for an awfully long time. I should check up on him. *(Rack looks all over the house and doesn't find him.) *'Rack': Where could he be? *'Reporter':(Voice only): Breaking news! A pack of wolves are going to city hall and-. *(The wolves attack the reporter.) *'NH': You didn't see anything! *(TV goes to static.) *'Rack': That sounded a lot like NH. No, it can't be, he would never. But what if.......... oh no, my NH! Don't do it! (Runs out of the house and to US's office'.)' *'Rack': US, US, US! *'US': Raclk, Raclk, Raclk! What's up? *'Rack': NH made a army with other wolves and he's coming here to kill you and take over the town! *'US': I'm sorry, what? I was cleaning my ear. *'Rack': US, this is serious! If we don't do anything, NH and his army will take over the town and kill you! You need to do something! *'US': I don't wanna. I just wanna sit on my butt now. *'Rack': Oh........ well I guess you don't want my lamp then........ *'US': Lamp? DID YOU JUST SAY LAMP?! *'Rack': Yep. Would've looked nice in your office too, but oh well...... *'US': I LOVE LAMP. GIMME! *'Rack': Only if you help me stop them. *'US': Fine. It better be a purple lamp. *'Rack': Oh it is. *'US': Then why are we flapping our gums!? Let's go! *(The two leave.) *(Cut to NH and his army.) *'Wolf #3': Are we there yet? *'NH': If you ask that one more time, I will kick you out of the army. *'Wolf': (mumbling): Not very leader like. *'NH': What was that?! *'Wolf': Oh nothing. You are just imagining things. *'NH': Mm. *(Rack and US bump into them.) *'Rack': NH! How could you?! *'Wolf': Our leader is friends with a human?! *(All the wolves laugh.) *'NH': I am not friends with that HUMAN! He owns me! *'Wolf': You are actually OWNED?! *(The wolves laugh even more.) *'NH': Stop laughing at me! *'Wolf': You are obviously unfit to be a leader. We are kicking you out of the club. Goodbye, and good day. *(They literally kick him out.) *'Wolf': I will assume leadership duties. We are now: The Army of the Wolves. Now, let us continue where we left off. *(The wolves head to town hall.) *'US': Hey, hey, hey! You're not going anywhere with me around! *'Wolf': Hahahahahha! You are just one person! *'US': Yep, but this one person is a black belt in karate! *(US uses her karate moves and attacks all the wolves. She then kicks them away.) *'US': Piece of cake. Now, to my office! (Walks on her hands to her office) *'NH': What just happened? *'Rack': I don't know, but I'm glad to see you! (Hugs NH) *'NH': Let go of me HUMAN! *'Rack': Sorry. Wanna go play with the squirrels? *'NH': YES. I haven't had one in ages! *(The two leave.) *(Rig pops up out of nowhere.) *'Rig': Come on, candy wrapper, talk to me! *'THE END'. Credits Starring *Rackliffelikespurple as Rack *New Heathera as NH *Utter solitude as US *Rigbybestie1510 as Rig *Wolves as Wolves *Reporter as Reporter *Dep Mayor as Dep Mayor *Children as Children *Teacher as Teacher Writing *Story by: New Heathera *Written by: Rackliffelikespurple *Additional Material: Utter solitude, New Heathera and Rigbybestie1510 Thanks To New Heathera, Utter solitude and Rigbybestie1510 for being the inspirations to the corresponding characters. Math Gives Me the Pooties *Lyrics by: Rackliffelikespurple Lyrics Rig: ''Math gives me the pooties, pooties, pooties, pooties pooties, pooties, pootie-'' (interrupted) Remix *Remix by: AngryGodzillaPie Click here for the remix. Other This was a little tricky to do, but I like the end result. I'm REALLY looking forward to next week's ep though! Thanks for reading! :) Category:Episodes